I Want To be With You
by Yokokitsu
Summary: As the years go by, Zaphikel watches his former protege destroy himself, while gaining ranks in heaven. Will he be forced to choose between his position and second love?Yaoi, ZaphikelRaziel.


Disclaimer- The fact that I draw like a two year old with crayons after Halloween should tell you something. Kaori Yuki is the genius! I own nothing!

A/N: This was started before Vol. 13, so please pretend like that never happened; it makes a lot more sense that way. Also,I love it's my first posting site. This was written for a contest and I had to include some guidlines-thus the notes at the bottom.Thanks, and I hope you enjoy!

I Want To Be With You

'Even though you love him?' Jibril's words echoed through his mind. Despite his reasoning, Zaphikel found that the Elemental Angel had hit the mark.

His thoughts wandered to his tragic affair with Anael, and his encounter with Etemenanki's brightest lamp: Adam Kadamon (1). As punishment for his affiliation with the doctor he had been branded a fallen angel and sentenced to death by his own hand.

'Watch me die, you slaves of God!' With that, he had slit his own throat. He had wanted to die; he believed that he had nothing left to live for. The Holy Hermit, though, had given him life again. In exchange for his sight. Because of this transaction, he was unable to see Raziel's face, and wished for that more than anything else. 'Even though I love him…'

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Red eyes searched the corridor for sightless ones. Now that heaven had been destroyed, Raziel had no need to hide his identity as an I-child. Because of the war, the Aion children were now allowed to laugh and play, above the slums. Just as Zaphikel had wanted them to.

The name startled him out of his daydreams. Oh well, if he couldn't find him, Raziel would find another way to tell the Great Thrones. Was it just him or did Lord Zaphikel spend more time hiding in his study then he had before, when he actually had work to do? Raziel shrugged and searched a nearby room for a feather quill and paper. He sat to write.

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Zaphikel-sama,

I fell now that my presence and service is no longer needed, and will be surrendering all my time to my candidacy in the Think-Tank. I wish I could have told you in person, but I couldn't find you. I apologize for any inconvenient circumstances.

Yours always,

Raziel: Think-Tank Candidate #4

Ironically, Zaphikel's first coherent thought after reading the note was, 'When did I get hard to find?' (2)

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Maybe it was for the better; Raziel didn't know. Indirectly resigning was easier, right? It had been three days since he had given up his position by Zaphikel's side. Or so the calendar said (3). It felt like an eternity.

When had the Great Thrones' schedule become imprinted on his brain? Raziel knew that right now, he would have been serving tea to the great angel. In about an hour, it would be time to search the ingenious hiding places the blind angel seemed to stumble on to avoid council meetings.

Raziel sighed and picked up his books. He had relinquished his job and had already gained two ranks. He was now Candidate #2 for the position of archangel. But what was the true cost?

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On his balcony, Zaphikel watched the other angels go about their business. What was his protégé doing? Funny how he still thought of him as that- his Second Lieutenant had taken Raziel's position. She was serious about her job and had been an important member of Anima Mundi. Still, Zaphikel felt her an inadequate replacement.

At night, dreams of Anael tortured the Great Thrones; his daydreams were plagued by the presence of the one whose face he had never seen. They were no better, neither more comforting. Not for the last time he debated with himself. He wanted to ask Raziel why he had left, but knew that visiting a former subordinate could inspire colorful rumors throughout the lower ranks. Each mental argument left the brilliant angel in utter confusion, and disappointment. Was love a lifetime of pain and sacrifice?

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A year went by, and Raziel graduated at the head of the class, achieving his goal as the new Archangel of Mathey: Fifth Level of Heaven. Thoughts of his former master came and left, but he was determined to do something for the pained and aching realm called "Paradise." No matter where you turned, even in these times of council-declared peace, crimes and blood leaked from a deep wound, left by corruption, and the dictatorship of Sevothtarte.

Raziel was occasionally ambushed, though, by fond memories. They were a hindrance to his work, often driving him to distraction and fits of lethargy. These slumps passed, but seemed to eat away at him inside. They usually appeared when there was a decision to be made about the Aion children. Placing aside emotions, Raziel made decisions in a level-headed manner. These memories would pass on, and he would get over them. Or so he thought.

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As time progressed, Zaphikel heard more and more about the new Principalities of Mathey's, Raziel (4), great deeds in Heaven. He also heard of his departure from sanity. When he found out that the younger angel had attacked a sister and nearly killed a lower rank soldier attempting to protect her, Zaphikel knew what was coming. Within the week, Raziel was transported for judgment, and eventually, experimenting, to the newly redesigned Empty Corridor. Here testing on angels still existed as a cruel form of punishment. Apparently the 'great deeds' had angered the council members enough to have him disposed of for a minor crime.

When he found out that the young leader had been sentenced back to a white, sterile, lab (still in use from Sevothtarte's reign) for research, Zaphikel lost all self control. He traveled quickly to Mathey, where the testing was running rampant. He was immediately taken to Raziel's 'cell.'

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Hooked up to the many monitors and other machines around him, the Principalities offered an eerie flashback to the outcast candidate Zaphikel had rescued so many hundreds of years ago (5). If not a little more mature, and boasting more defined features. The sight of the "Chariot of God" was jarring. He had arrived in a state of disarray, showing signs of worry and fatigue. It worried Raziel. Yet somehow, in this off state, the younger angel still found him attractive, even…stunning! He would have blushed, but the blood testing had left him with very little to spare, he contented himself by simply looking away.

He was asked the exact same question, "Do you wish to live?"

This time, Raziel answered, "I want to be with you." With that, he collapsed and fell forward into Zaphikel's arms

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Months passed, and things went back to the way they had been. Raziel forfeited his position as Principalities, another position he had given up. This time, however, he had no qualms about the decision. An enraged Second Lieutenant was dismissed, a humble and subdued Raziel given back his former position. The only difference in the day to day life in Etemenanki was a noticeable tension between the two star-crossed angels. A brewing storm of emotions about to break.

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A peal of thunder rang out over Atzuilth. Raziel shot out of bed. Six months and still the recurring nightmares lurked deep in his sleeping mind. Each was the same, with a person, whose face was wrapped in bandages lying on an operating table. As the doctor prepared to remove stitches holding a deep gash on the neck closed, amirror, falling from the stand by the operating table,reveals Raziel's face. As he backs away, a pretty blonde-haired nurse, waiting by the gurney, maliciously stabs out the test subject's eyes. The patient's bandages slowly pull away to reveal the bleeding face of his master, Zaphikel.

Upon waking up, Raziel always placed the blonde nurse's name: Anael.

He sighed and wandered through the house, towards the kitchen. The summer home of the Great Thrones was modeled after a Japanese house, oddly enough, and was quite easy to navigate (6). Raziel adeptly boiled up tea for two, Zaphikel and himself, and sat down- formal seiza position.

His diligence was rewarded when said angel appeared wordlessly and joined him. Between sips of tea, the two chatted about the past five decades. Inevitably, the conversation turned to Raziel's imprisonment in the Empty Corridor. Suddenly, the younger angel bursts into uncontrollable tears. "I had missed you so much!" he sobbed.

Without thinking, Zaphikel took him into his arms- cradling him and protecting him from the world around. Surprised, Raziel stifled his crying and sat still. He was enjoying the closeness of the moment. Humiliated by his thoughts, Raziel sought to hide his blush by nuzzling closer to his care-taker. Thankfully, the older angel didn't notice and chirped out, "I know! I missed you too. No one else around here is any fun!"

"That's not what I meant!" Raziel yelled. "You don't understand! I love you!"

"You silly thing," the other retorted. "I've always loved you. How long did it take you to figure it out!" A stunned Raziel could only stare as the 'dignified' Seventh Great Angel rambled on. Over half of a century! I mean honestly, Ra-…!"

The sentence was cut short by a pair of lips clamped over Zaphikel's mouth. Effectively shutting him up, for once. "So talkative," Raziel mumbled. Both knowing what was sure to come next, the couple made their way to the master bedroom, undressing as they went. "So impatient," came the answer. That night, master and apprentice became absorbed in nothing but love, and enraptured in passion.

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The next day, Tokyo Disneyland was graced by two angels in love. Sharing ice cream, riding roller coasters, and later taking the subway to the other side of Japan… (Oops) Both were happier than they had ever thought possible before.

Over fifty years, the two had fallen in love, and lost it all; only to regain it all in one moment, and rediscover the ardor. One had gained status and sway in the high ranks of heaven, only to give it away for a mere emotion. For a fleeting time of happiness, a motivation superior to any one bribe Heaven could conjure. The other had watched from afar- observing his love waste away, unable to do anything. He had been helpless and alone, until finally, he had given up status and safety to bring back his Sweet Raziel from the brink of self-destruction. Both, however, had given all and taken nothing sacrificing wants and needs for life's greatest mystery, and God's bane… love.

Owari

A/N: This came out way more dramatic than I thought it would have. I still like it though ;D.

(1)Lamp- a spiritual or enlightening being. i.e.- Adam Kadamon

(2)Do I even need to point this one out? The note. XD

(3)The timepiece- calendar.

(4)I made it so that as this was taking place, Raziel was gaining levels of power in heaven

(5)Angels are gifted with eternal life, though not immortal. But I know you knew that!

(5)Remember Vol. 11 where Zaphi reveals his past, and is wearing the kimono. Drools

Please R&R! AlthoughI need the help, Iswear to God the people on Mediaminer laugh at you for wanting reviews.

"Hah! You need help, but you're not gonna get it from me! Mwa ha ha ha hah!"

Begins crying "Meanies!" Constructive criticism needed!


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